Husband and Wife Team

Samples of Writing

The New Car (Malcolm in the Middle, Fan Script)

FADE IN:

INT. LIVING ROOM – MORNING

A typical Saturday morning. MALCOLM, DEWEY, and HAL are all in their PAJAMAS, lounging on the couch watching Saturday morning cartoons. REESE is off in the corner READING a BUSINESS MAGAZINE, but we’re not paying attention to him right now. A big pan of cooked bacon is in the center of the coffee table, and the boys are eating it like popcorn. Empty, dirty plates litter the coffee table, along with the normal potpourri of junk. The cartoons are dumb and loud, as usual.

TV DINOSAUR

Hey Mr. Bickery Tickery Bop! I always like the way you pop, pop, pop!

MALCOLM

The Tyrannosaurus Rex was a meat-eater, why is he singing a song with a triceratops?

HAL

Maybe they’re friends.

DEWEY

      (around a mouthful of bacon)

I don’t know dad, if you tasted as good as bacon, I would eat you.

Dewey and Hal laugh.

LOIS ENTERS, in her work uniform, picking things up and getting ready to go. She pulls the bacon away from the boys and is rewarded with a satisfactory chorus of protest.

HAL/MALCOLM/DEWEY

Heeeyyy!!

LOIS

Plates. Sink.

All of them leap to their feet and take plates, forks, and even trash to the kitchen, then pile back onto the couch. Lois puts down the bacon, then notices something is off.

Reese isn’t watching TV. He’s sitting properly in a corner, absorbed in a BUSINESS MAGAZINE. He’s been ignoring the whole exchange, and has an interested, goofy grin on his face. Her eyes narrow suspiciously.

LOIS

Reese! What are you doing?

REESE

      (attempted innocent look)

Nothing mother…

This shocking news forces Malcolm, Dewey, and Hal turn and watch the scene. Lois WALKS over and YANKS the magazine out of his hands. A second, DIRTY MAGAZINE falls out of the inside of the business magazine. Lois glares at Reese and smacks him with it.

LOIS

Looks like I get the day off. You know what to do!

Reese humbly does as he’s told and LEAVES.

MALCOLM

      (to camera)

Sometimes I wonder if Reese is actually the genius, but just has poor execution skills.

Read Full Script

Trucker

I’m not a driver. I never have been. I trust my feet and a few horses I’ve met. 

But nobody else could go. And I was expendable. So, off I went. 

The rig was huge. I’d obviously seen them before. But I’d never gotten close to one. Belying all logic, the chrome, mirrors, and hood were still so shiny I could see myself in them. I knew as soon as the wheels started moving, the mud would cover all of that. Road maintenance wasn’t really a priority anymore. 

I took a deep breath and climbed up into the cab. My faithful, ragged hiking backpack felt dirty compared to the pristine interior, but I threw it between the two captain’s chairs, then turned to Sam. 

“Okay, come on,” I invited. He jumped in eagerly. His muddy paws lightly passed over my seat as he took his place on the passenger side, expectantly waiting for the engine to start. The truck would be comfortably dirty in no time. 

Nobody was there to see me off. Old Willy had given me lessons on how the big rig worked in comparison to a normal car, and I figured out the added sticks and buttons fairly easily. 

I looked over at Sam. He looked back at me, excitement written all over his quivering features. He always loved an adventure. 

“God, please help us not to wreck BEFORE we get there.” I sent the prayer up as I yanked the truck into gear and pulled out.

Up Late with Eric (and Matt)

Comedic, educational variety show with a bent towards apologetics and a Christian worldview. This is a first draft. The show was written for a certain set of people, who were busy at the time and remain busy. 

GOD MADE IT, WHY CAN’T I EAT IT?

SCENE 1 – THE DESKS

Typical “late show” set, except there are two desks, one classy, normal-sized one with a RED TELEPHONE on it, the other kid-sized. ERIC is sitting at his desk, looking over his papers. He looks up, looks over at the little desk, then opens his mouth to speak.

Suddenly, there’s a huge CRASH from backstage. MATT comes bounding in wearing pajamas and runs around the set, finally stopping beside ERIC. He is quivering with energy and can’t seem to stand still.

ERIC

(Exasperated) Matt! I told you no sugar before the show!

MATT

But God made sugar!!

ERIC

Just because God made it, doesn’t mean you need to eat a bunch of it!

MATT

But it’s SOOOOO yummy! And all my friends eat it!

ERIC

But it makes you really hyper (aside to us) and useless (back to Matt) when you eat a bunch of it. God doesn’t like us to get addicted to things or put things in our body that are going to hurt it.

MATT

(crosses his arms) Fine! (Stomps off stage)

ERIC

(turns to the camera) That’s actually a good introduction to today’s show. God made everything in this world, but that doesn’t mean he wants us to eat everything or do everything that can be done. Always remember, God made us for a purpose. And the closer we can get to what He intended…

ANNOUNCER

We interrupt Eric to bring you a special news report from Israel. This is old news, but it makes it sound very important if we interrupt people this way! Paul, in a letter to the Ephesians (????) just announced blah blah blah

Bad cell-phone video, very blurry, pixilated, of robed men in a building, but you can’t really see much of anything. An unintelligible voice is saying something. Subtitles say the verse about the purpose of humans.

ANNOUNCER

Back to you, Eric!

Back in the studio, MATT is sitting at his little desk beside ERIC. MATT has a dumbstruck look on his face.

ERIC

Wow, that’s awesome!

MATT

I don’t get it. Well, I kinda do, but when did this happen? And why would He create humans if they were such trouble? I mean, most of us don’t exactly follow our purpose. Most people are just running around chasing butterflies.

———————————————–

INT. DESKS ON MAIN STAGE

HEAVENLY 5-0

MATT is at his desk, looking expectantly at the camera. A cardboard cutout with Eric’s face is sitting in his chair.

MATT

In this episode, we’ve made Eric more funny! (He runs over to behind the cardboard cutout and tries to imitate Eric’s voice).

Hey everybody! It’s Eric!

ENTER KENT ANDREW

Kent is dressed as an angel policeman.

KENT ANDREW

(Makes siren noise) Hey! Matt! You can’t start the show without Eric. He’s the one in charge. You get a ticket for that. (Starts writing out a ticket).

MATT

Oh, man! But I just wanted to make the show more fun!

ENTER ERIC

ERIC

Hey guys, what’s going on?

KENT ANDREW

Matt tried to start the show without you.